‘My Lazy Girlfriend Lacks Ambition And She’s Pregnant For Me!’ (Please Advice)


What will you do if your wife/husband-to-be asks for breakup after 3years of dating?


‘My Lazy Girlfriend Lacks Ambition And She’s Pregnant For Me!’

So I met my girl about a year ago during the start of the lockdown. We bonded real quick…she’s easy-going, sorta smart, mad S3xy and funny. Two months after we started dating, she moved in with me and began shuttling between my place and her sister’s.


I work from home and my place is structured such that there’s not much to do to maintain it. Although I work from home, I go out now and again for business and during my time out I run most of the errands…my girl ensures that it’s only when I’m going out that she gets whatever she needs, from the market or errands around the area mainly cause she’s often in a pant and bra watching a movie or just being lazy. She’s a good cook but a lot of times I found chow coming late or not at all, and there was always raw food to prepare…sometimes her excuse for not cooking could be she couldn’t get one ingredient or the other either because she didn’t have cash on her or some other reason…there’s mobile money just outside our gate and if she doesn’t have the money she can call me to make a transfer but the main issue was laziness. I swept and mopped like 80% of the time, ran errands like 100%, cooked like 20% or the time (starved like 20% or sorted myself out someway), she did dishes 80% of the time and I brought like 100% of the money we lived on.

She is doing her MSc and our relationship started during the lockdown so she wasn’t going to school. She was job searching (more like job waiting) so this gave her a lot of idle time which she spent watching Zee World or being on social media. I soon found a way to engage her in the job I do from home, and with the money she had saved in the bank (over 400K), she started work with me. I purchased a laptop for her for this purpose and so she could develop herself in other areas via online courses but she didn’t do much work…working like two hours daily, very late at night…I sometimes complained but tried encouraging her as much as possible, especially when she made some success.

I’m sure you’d ask why I stayed in the relationship despite all of this? I was pussy whipped, had no other options given the nature of my work, saw some potential in her ( I know, a stupid thing to say) and thought I was in love (I’m 29 and shouldn’t have been that stupid).

Fast forward to December last year, we discovered she was pregnant, a month pregnant. Told her we should keep the child and get married…she suggested we could abort since we weren’t quite ready but I said what was a couple more months gonna make a difference? embarassed embarassed embarassed


Since then till now, we’ve been quarrelling non-stop, one issue after another of which it’s mainly me raising the issues. Maybe it’s the tension that comes from knowing I might be starting a family with so many unresolved issues. I’ve raised my concerns and told her she’d need to be more responsible in the relationship if things will work and even though she tells me she knows, I know deep down she doesn’t mean it or might not be up to the task of being a married adult. From some of our talk she expects I’d take care of all the financial responsibilities and have suggested a couple of times we get help for chores (we’ve moved to a bigger space now) but I told her in clear terms that that’s not how I imagined my life…having help for chores and the likes, besides, it’s just a two-bedroom flat.

I’ve purchased some of the things we’d be needing for our wedding and we’re supposed to do an introduction this coming week but I’m having cold feet and just want to call it off.

I’m bringing this here to know how I can manage this situation…I can be lazy but I’m a really ambitious person so this pushes me but my girl is not just lazy, but unambitious. How do I manage the situation…there’s a child involved now and will need to consider the child but at the same time, I can’t take on this much stress nor have my ambitions cut short because my partner is lazy.

What can I do??



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